Thursday, January 20, 2011


Zsa Zsa Gabor's mansion is on the market for $28 million. Dam, she's asking and arm and a leg for it. Let me re-phrase that.

An uncensored "Playboy" magazine is coming to the iPad in March. Is it easy navigating the iPad with one hand?

The House voted to repeal the Health Care Overhaul. The death squad has acted.

Regis Philbin has announced that this will be his last year doing his morning show. Afterwards, he will reunite with Larry King on "I Shouldn't be Alive."

Obama met with Chinese President Hu Jintao. Both leaders agreed to a compromise. Obama agreed to bend over backwards for China. China agrees to use vaseline.

In Texas, researchers have found bone fragments of a 9,400 year old domestic dog. It was found near a 9,400 year old fire hydrant.


  1. Ha! You won't be able to navigate the iPad with one hand. Hahaha.

  2. I think even Doc would've winced at the first one. haha. He would've laughed at the last one. You've got the late night monologue gift my friend.

  3. Would anyone subscribe to a censored Playboy magazine? Except me of course. I read it for the articles

  4. LOL Israel. Wanted to hop over and say hello!
    Happy New Year!

  5. The ones about Regis and China were priceless! I read them to my daughters. You are so funny, Israel. I hate to say it, but I laughed loud at the first joke too!

  6. Thanx to all of you for the nice words.

    Gnetch - I'll still try.

    Copyboy- Thanx for that. That is a goal of mine to write for one of the big studios. Help me out. You're Jewish ain't you? For God's sake my first name is Israel.

    Sharaf- Nice and short.

    Jay- Come on now. Even you don't believe that.

    Lyrical Designer- Good to hear from you. Glad you are back. :)

    Yvonne- Come estas sin verguenza. Don't you just love that Mexican insult when your mother or tia busts it out?

    Belle- Thanx for spreading my smut worldwide. BTW, you should get the prize soon. I promise it has been mailed.

  7. I'm not sure about the one handed navigation of the uncensored Playboy issue on the Ipad; however, I'm sure someone will master this trick and become an overnight celebrity by posting it on Youtube.

  8. Ugh the way things are going right now I'm not surprised that China will be but fucking America. Aren't they doing that already?

    I should be dead show with Regis and Larry, hmmm I might watch that!

  9. Israel - Loco! Yeah, my mom does it to me constantly!!! :)