Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Are you good with computers? Neither am I but I have IT friends

In honor of Le'nny (read below) I decided to share with you a "hook up" (A thing of value for free or reduced price).

In this case it's FREE!!!!

I had computer problems a while back and my friend "Rod" (insert sexual pun here)told me of two tools that can clean your computer for free. Disclaimer: I don't know the difference between the internets and Windows so you bear the risk. I do know that I have used it and it does seem to make my computer run better. Enjoy!


http://housecall.trendmicro.com/

http://www.piriform.com/

Lootin' Lenny has been overlooked for years!

Back in the days there was a character on Good Times named Lenny that was always trying to sell crap. I believe he was the inspiration for the original "brother man " character on "Martin." The guy always had the hook up for whatever you wanted (If the cash was right). However, I couldn't even find a good picture of him on the internet. Granted. he wasn't a main character on the show but he was funny. Let's not ever forget Le'nny cuz laughs he has ple'nty

His name is Le'nny and he has ple'nty

8-31-10



Kate Gosselin said she wants to give acting a try. She should begin by acting like a mother to her kids.

Two men traveling from Chicago to Amsterdam were arrested in Amsterdam. Following this arrest, the security level has increased to red district.

Mexican authorities have arrested drug kingpin Edgar Valdez Villarreal nick- named "La Barbie". His partner Ken is still a fugitive.

Pittsburgh Steeler's Troy Polamalu has insured his long hair for $1 million dollars. He also has a filed a restraining order on a "Delilah."

Lindsey Lohan's dad is planning to open up a rehab center in California. His slogan: I'm not only the president, I'm also a client.

Monday, August 30, 2010

You Down with OPP? ( Montebello CA niece's soccer fund raiser )

8-30-10



Roger Clemens pleaded not gulity to charges that he lied to Congress about his steroid use. He also issued a counter-suit claiming Congress has been lying to us for years.

The Bank of Japan took measures to ease monetary policies to help kick start the economy. If this doesn't work, they'll turn to plan B: The Karate Kid.

Designer Tina Sparkles created and displayed a one-shouldered dress out of discarded computer wires at the Austin Fashion week. Afterwards, the model wearing the dress was bombared with hundreds of wedding proposals from computer geeks.

Paris Hilton will be charged with a felony after police found cocaine in her bag. The cop asked her if she did blow and Paris responded, "haven't you seen my movie?"

Glenn Beck held a rally in front of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington. He said the purpose of it was to restore honor. He then dismissed himself from the event.

Today marks the 5th year anniversary of Hurricance Katrina or as George W. Bush calls it, that place I should've gone sooner to.

Friday, August 27, 2010

My Trip to Florence/Normandie



Tonight I took my girlfriend to South Central Los Angeles. She is from San Diego and wanted to see South Central. I wanted to go to Florence and Normandie - the site of the infamous beating of Reginald Denny during the L.A riots. I took the 10 east freeway and I exited on Normandie and I went south. I was a little bit apprehensive because South Central has a violent history. But I wanted to see how much things have changed since the riots.

A simple rule of thumb to know you are approaching South Central is the street numbers begin to increase. I passed by 25th street,44th street,56th street etc. I was in South Central. One of the first things I noticed is that the streets get darker as you approach SC. The streets are less well lit than Downtown Los Angeles. There are many that walk the street. There are many food vendors as well, especially taquerias and Salvadorean restaurants.

There is lots of action. People are hustling on street corners, there is tons of traffic, and there is an air of tension that I feel there. People are on guard. I was.

The other eerie thing about South Central is that just about every block has a church or a liquor store. One comedian says that they both serve a purpose - to escape. I can see why. The infrastructure in SC is horrible. They are lacking resources. The parks get taken over by gangs and I didn't see one library in my trip. I made a u-turn and went back home. As the street numbers got smaller, the streets got brighter and I relaxed a bit.

L.A Riots 1992 Florence/Normandie

Thursday, August 26, 2010

This is the video I was watching in the story below

Exposing Hypocrisy - Ettiquette hero or jerk?



Today I was either a hero or a jerk. You decide. I was on my computer at Starbucks talking to my sister on the phone when she mentioned a funny video I should watch. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U55mgeVlcL4). I'm watching the video, laughing out loud as I'm chatting with my sister. A young girl sits down in the couch right next to me. She's like 2 feet away. "Do you have headphones?" she asks me. This is a passive-aggressive way of telling me shut the hell up I need silence. I apologize to her and tell her that I will be silent as I was just looking at one quick video. I left Youtube, hung up the phone and was navigating the internet IN SILENCE when my "neighbor" gets on the phone and starts speaking REALLY LOUD. " ha ha ha ha" was mixed in with some other nonsense. I tried to ignore it but she continued to blab away even louder. " ha ha ha ha". She was beginning to sound more and more like Charlie Brown's teacher. After about 20 minutes of her rudeness I decided to call her out.

I looked at her straight in her eyes and asked her, "Is noise a one way street? because earlier you asked me in a very condescending way if I had headphones when you could've just asked me to lower my volume. Then you get on the phone and start blabbing away. I find that very hypocritical." She was shocked! She said, "you are right I apologize forgive me." I was heated. "It wouldn't have been a big deal had you not made a big deal about my loudness. I just find it hypocritical and condescending that you asked me about headphones. Come one do people really carry headphones?" She kneels in front of me like I'm the queen of England and asks me, "do you forgive me?" I said yes and she walked away. Later I learned from a Starbucks employee that she always goes to Starbuck to read her bible. I'm going to hell.

8-26-10



Jimmy Carter arrived in North Korea to advocate the release of an American who is serving an 8 year sentence. Who better to negotiate than a man who is an expert on nuts.

A British spy was murdered and stuffed in a bag and left at a London apartment. Police have made no arrest but according to "Clue" it was the butler.

The DEA is looking for Ebonics Experts to help fight the war on drugs. Applicants are asked to be fixin' to apply you know what I'm sayin?

The conservative Elisabeth Hasselbeck now says she supports gay marriage and called Obama a cool guy. Showing reciprocity Keith Olbermann is now saying he hates brown people and called Glen Beck rational.

A British woman is receiving public scorn after she was videotaped throwing a cat inside a trash bin. The cat survived so it's still curious.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

You can dance if you want to

8-25-10



Using a DNA test,Jean-Paul Mulders and historian Marc Vermeeren have concluded that Hitler may have had African and Jewish genes. This may explain why he liked going on safari expeditions but only if he could get really good deals.

John McCain trounced J.D. Hayworth in the Republican primary in Arizona after spending $20 million on his campaign. He vows to eliminate wasteful,goverment spending.

Walmart is recalling 380,000 pounds of contaminated meat, not including its customers.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average fell 147 points after Home resales dropped 27% in July. Nowadays, an "open house" means your neighbor left the door open.

A study published by JAMA finds that cognitive/behavioral therapy is more effective than supportive therapy for those with ADHD. I forgot the punchline.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Thank you Sir! (Signs of an aging man)



My regular readers know my pre-occupation with the aging process or as I like to call it, rigormortis. In one of my postings, Snap, Crackle, Pop...", I mentioned the weird sound effects that my brittle bones make. I also mentioned the many supplements I take to keep the grim reaper at bay. Besides the obvious signs of physical errosion, there is another "test" of sorts that let's you know that youth is fading fast. Here it is: The DUDE TO SIR RATIO. Let me explain. At one point in my younger life, people referred to me as "dude" "dawg" or "man" or any other term that the young people use. Incidently, my UK readers can substitute the word "lad" here to make the same point. At some point, people began to call me "sir" more often and dude less often. The greater the discrepancy in either direction, the clearer the signs that either: A- You are in the prime of your life or B- You need to learn terms like "PPO Insurance". In business settings, it is customary to use good manners and address people as "sir" or "ma'am". Such as, "do you want anything else with that order ma'am? I get it. However, besides being called "sir" more often and dude less often, I'm noticing how people call me sir. The other day, the barrista at Starbucks said, "hello sir". But he said it with such reverence as though I was the old uncle that he used to play basketball with as a kid. These days, being called dude is such a rare event like watching Halley's Comet. Did you hear that? I think my hip is out of place. Got to go.

8-23-10

Isn't building a mosque near Ground Zero in NY similar to building a church in Native American land?

A new study reveals that rectal cancer has risen to people under the age of 40. Researchers say that one way to eliminate exposure is to watch less Fox news.

Katy Perry's new album "Teenage Dreams" contains a song called E.T about a hot, alien, guy. That song is banned in Arizona.

Drew Barrymore recently told a reporter that long-distance relationships are hard. No wonder, he was always trying to phone home.

Tiger Woods and his wife's divorce is official. Though the terms of the settlement are undisclosed, some are saying it's $500 million over par.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

God works in mysterious ways; like using Old Korean men



I know that Mr. Mijagi is Japanese, Daniel son. That's not the point. Allow me to wax on with the story. Being that this is Sunday, I thought I'd get "religious" with a true tale of what happened to me a few days ago and to address the possibility that perhaps God was speaking to me via an old, Korean man.

I had gotten my daily coffee from Starbucks and was going home when an old, Asian man approached me in the parking lot.

"Can you take me to...?"
"get in", I said.
It's true. I did not know this man but he looked frail and lost. If he happened to kill me, then he deserved it for his convicting act.
"Can you take me to church on Valley View?" He continued, " I'm part of ministry from Korea. You know I spoke to American about Jesus. My English no good but holy spirit worked through me and he accepted Jesus. Tears come from his eyes."
"Do you go to church?" he asked.
"I used to but not anymore."
"mabybe you should go back"
He told me that he wanted to get food but " you can't get too much food for $1 dollar." I offered to pay for his meal. "I like Chinese food or burrito" he told me. I told him I'd get him a burrito nearby. He went on to tell me that he knew nobody and only had one dollar. " Is it ok if I take a picture for my website? (blog). "No No" he waved, almost in disgust. He probably thought I was weird. We arrived at "Juan Pollo" and I got him a giant, chicken burrito. We did not speak to each other and sat in separate tables. The food was ready and I handed it to him ready to take him to his destination. "It's o.k I take bus." "Ok". I left wondering if I had freaked him out. I felt good to have fed him. I concluded that hey may have been going to the church to eat. Maybe Jesus was reincarnated as an old,Korean man. Maybe, the Korean man was sent as a messenger to tell me to go church. Maybe,King Jong Il has spies in Anaheim gathering intelligence.

There is something about Cat Stevens...

There is something about the music of Cat Stevens that gives me both joy and sadness at the same time. It's weird because I can't really say I'm a big "fan" because I don't know his music by heart but I am casually familiar with him. However, there is something in his voice that makes me feel the emotions of the song. I'm not sure if it's his tone or how the melody is composed but the bottle line is I feel it. To me, this happens when music transcends the senses and becomes a sort of spiritual experience. Talk to artists and many will tell you that their "art" feels to be guided by devine forces; by a soul. Without trying to sound too metaphysical, I tend to agree with that sentiment. They key is being in tune with the devine when it speaks to you.

Cat Stevens

Friday, August 20, 2010

8-20-10

Pictures taken by Nasa show evidence that the moon is shrinking. Either that or it just appears smaller because the universe is expanding.

NBC has renewed "Last call with Carson Daly" His fan couldn't be happier.

Brett Favre is reported to have tension with head coach Brad Childress saying he “has no clue about offense”. No offense intended.

Michael J Fox is returning to televsion with a guest star role in “The Good Wife” He will play an optimist that nods yes to everything anyone says, not by choice.

Their use of words is getting celebrities in trouble these days. Dr. Laura quit her show for using the N-word. Jennifer Anniston angered advocates for people with disabilities for using the “R” word (Retarded). Sarah Palin is angering Webster’s for making up words.

"Bottles and Cans" ( a poem of sorts )

Every day I hear the sound
Clank Clank Clank
The bottles crashing against each other in a sea
of more bottles and cans.
Clank Clank Clank
The sound repeats itself over and over
like church bells.
It is a sad sound. It is the sound of the poor
cashing in their wages to the recycling man.
The sound never ends. Men and women of all ages line up
and stomp on the cans.
The weary step on the cans with a desperation
as though the cans represent lost dreams.
The lines are long with the masses-
middle aged women with unbrushed hair,
short,Mexican men with baseball caps,
skinny,white dudes with tattoos and thick moustaches.
One kid holds her mother's hand as mom waits in line.
a forty-something,white lady dashes from her truck
holding a bag of potential cash and
her teen daughter holds a bag also. She looks embarassed. She's dressed hip
and cool but it's hard to be hip in this environment.
They head towards the line,
joining in on the symphony.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Fellow blogger writes a book check out the video promo below

Remember books? Those square artifacts with papers stuck between two hard covers. Well, William Snyder has written one of them and it promises to be entertaining. The cool thing about the production and distribution of it is that he did it all by himself. The book is called "The eight fingered criminal's son" and it is a collection of true stories. The title alone does it for me. William Snyder the self-proclaimed #167 dad has some room to move up in the rankings. It begins with the purchase of this book. Who knows, when the royalties come in, he may become the #166 dad. I'm being optimistic. Get the book. Tom Jones not included.

William Z Synder Book Promo 2

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

8-18-10 How low can you go?



Dr. Laura is leaving her radio show after the backlash she received for using the N-word with a caller on the air. The good news is she is getting a starring role in the next Mel Gibson film.

Rod Blagojevich's corruption trial was filled with tension. When the verdict was read and he was cleared of all but one count, the hair on his head stood up, I think.

Dr. Frank Ryan, a plastic surgeon to many Hollywood celebrities, has died in a car accident after he was "texting" and accidently went over a cliff. Funeral services will be held at the Hollywood Wax Museum.

Katie Holmes told New York Magazine that after 4 years, she is still star struck by Tom Cruise. She should report that domestic abuse.

An armless pianist,Liu Wei wowed the audience and judges on "China's got talent" when he played a a moving rendition of Mariage D'amour. There hasn't been anyone with with his foot skills since Larry Craig was in an airport bathroom.

Joaquin Phoenix has announced the release of his rap documentary entitled "I'm still here" which coincidently is the same title of Brett Favre's autobiography.

Eggs coming from Wright County Iowa are being recalled in 8 states over Salmonella concerns. This was an easy case to crack.

In South Carolina 29 year old Shaquan Duley is being charged with murder after her kids were found submerged in a river. This case is very similar to the Susan Smith case where a mother also drowned her kids in South Carolina. What’s going on in South Carolina? It’s like there is something in their water.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Thank you for your support



I want to thank all the bloggers and readers of this site for all the support I received while out of commission for a while. Alot has happened in the last few days. I won an Oscar as seen here but I couldn't have won it without you guys. I share this Oscar with you. Oh yeah, and God too. My left hand is still a bit numb but I'm still streching it and hoping for the best. I really missed blogging and reading blogs as well. So I apologize for the inactivity on my part but I think I'm back for good. I'm just taking precautions. The rest has re-energized me and I plan on providing you guys with some entertaining posts including my video of the best tacos in East L.A. Look out for that!

8-16-2010

A crash landing of a Boeing 737 in the Carribean, carrying 131 passengers, is being called a miracle because only one person was killed. Overlooked may have been the bigger miracle- no one had missing luggage.

Allergy specialists are warning that the season for hay fever is about to begin. That's good news for horses or "Fonzie".

The "Craigslist killer" suspect Philip Markoff was found dead in a jail from an apparent suicide. However, his couch is still available free of charge if you can pick it up.

Tila Tequila says she will sue organizers of the Insane Clown Posse after she was injured when the crowd threw rocks and bottles at her. The bottle is suing Tila Tequila for catching herpes.

Sen. Harry Reid has split from Obama on his opposition to building a mosque near Ground Zero in New York City. Obama responded by issuing a Fatwa against him.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Doctor to me: "Are you on the computer alot?"



A few days ago, I was lying in bed with my crazy thoughts when I experienced a tingling sensation on my left hand. I thought it had fallen asleep and thought nothing of it. However, the next day I still had the numbness in my hand. This freaked me out! In my mind, I'm laying in a casket or connected to an I.V ( I tend to consider worse case scenarios). I wasn't sure what was wrong with me so I exercised hoping I would feel better. The tingling was still there so I went to a a Korean accupuncture who fed me some bullshit and put pins in my body to " spread the energy ". I'm big on supplements and "alternative healing" so I gave it a shot. $100 dollars later, the numbness was still there. I told the "doctor" that and he replied with, " it's going to take a few times before it goes away..." I was had but he was a good salesperson so he got rewarded for his performance.

Today I went to a clinic for poor people since I don't have health insurance and I am poor. The doctor did some test on my hands. " Do you text alot?" "Everyday" I responded "Are you on the computer alot? I sheepishly answer "yes". ( I didn't mention this blog). The doctor said that I have to limit my computer use, take Ibuprofen, and squeeze a tennis ball. He believes that I just have a pinched nerve. So in the next few days, I may take some time off on a doctor's order. This Saturday I will also take more tests to check my blood pressure and cholesterol levels just to make sure I'm ok.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

My nephew can dance better than me!

8-11-10 ( a stand in historic Olvera Street Los Angeles,CA)



A JetBlue flight attendant has reached internet fame after he told off a rude customer over the intercom, opened and rode down the emergency chute with two beers in his hands as he quit his job. That's how you do an exit interview.

Former Idol winner, Fantasia Barrino has been released from a hospital after she overdosed after learning that she was filmed having sex with a married man. I'm pretty sure that this Fantasia film will not be picked up by Disney.

Florida's Republican attorney, Bill McCollum is proposing a bill that is tougher than Arizona on illegal aliens. He has a big hurdle to overcome though. It's called South Florida.

Michelle Obama and her 9 year old daughter arrived in Spain. They won't do the running of the bulls. They are running away from the bull.

Alanis Morissette confirmed that she is pregnant and expecting hir first child. I guess the jagged little pill didn’t work.

Monday, August 9, 2010

"Honey I bought you a gift"



Whenever you receive a gift, there are two standard responses: 1- You didn't have to or 2- "How cuuuuute". I recently received a "gift" from my girlfriend. It was a hair remover thingy wingy. At first I thought, "what the hell am I that hairy? Then I thought, wow she really knows my needs. I wasn't sure how much I would enjoy this device. Can I be honest here? I love it! When I put it up my nose and hear the destruction of unwanted hair, I feel victorious. When I hear the "pop" of the hair being chopped away like an angry lumberjack, I get a certain sense of accomplishment. I feel the same way after taking a shower or buying milk.

Kids this is what you have to look forward to

8-9-10 now hear this



Van Halen is planning to record their first album in 12 years. They will do a re-mixed single of “jump” but will be re-named “hop”.

President Obama teamed up with several NBA superstars including Magic Johnson for a charity event that benefits wounded veterans. The real magic was done by Obama who made his approval rating disappear overnight.

Zsa Zsa Gabor is leaving the hospital and heading home after getting a "hip replacement." Now she's ready to appear on MTV and be cool.

Mark Hurd, the now ex-CEO of HP has resigned amid allegations of sexual harrasment by an ex HP contractor Jodie Fisher, an ex soft corn porn actress. This is a case of determining intent. namely what "her ass meant?"

A man has been freed after being in jail since 2007 for a fatal, Toyota crash after the court reversed the decision based on the evidence of faulty Toyota brakes. His first words as a free man: “Oh what a feeling!”.



Thursday, August 5, 2010

8-5-10

Testifying at the trial of the war crimes of former Liberian ruler Charles Taylor, Super-model Naomi Campbell told the court that she received blood diamonds. Actually, they didn't start out as blood diamonds but she gets in a bunch of fist fights.

A Federal Judge has ruled that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional and overturned a gay marriage ban. The back and forth on this ruling has inspired Hollywood producers to bring back an old show: 8 is enough.

Neil Armstrong, the first man to walk on the moon, turned 80. Nowadays his walker helps him take small steps. Forget about giant leaps for anyone.

Jennifer Aniston said that she paid homage to Barbra Streisand by posing as her saying "She's a true renaissance woman." That's because she was there when it happened.

Aretha Franklin was injured in Brooklyn NY when she fell on stage. Maybe that’s a sign she should R-E-T-I-R-E.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

8-3-10

Bristol Palin has called off the engagement with Levi Johnson and has moved back with Sarah Palin. Sarah Palin told reporters that sometimes the only solution is to deconclusimment a relationship.

Rumors are circulating that Brett Favre is retiring. I know what you're thinking. It's the boy who cried wolf. But after 19 years in the NFL, it may be the man who is crying ouch!

Bloomberg is reporting that AT&T, Verizon, and T Mobile are working with Discover to allow the smartphones to act as credit cards. However, if you run up the credit card debt it will be difficult to cut up and shred your phone.

The Hawaiian marine natural monument Papahanaumokuakea has been named a U.N World Heritage site. And your thought your Papa was complicated.

Leading Republicans are pushing to alter the 14th Amendment that grants automatic citizenship to anyone born in the U.S. They also want to change the preamble to read: We the white people only...

"Where are we eating Chinese?" ..." Let me spell it instead"

RE " What the F - - - did you do in your life?"

The guy in the video was kicked out of Tang's Donuts in Los Angeles for being drunk. In his defense, he says he was helping out his friend after he flew threw the window at the coffee shop. Tang's is located on Sunset and Fountain near Hollywood. Tang's used to be a hot spot for chess players. Years ago I used to play the crazies there. Today it is a shadow of it's former self and few people actually visit the place. Notice how the chess players in the video just stay glued to the board. I told you guys I carry my camera everywhere. Enjoy!

" What the F - - - did you do in your life?"

Monday, August 2, 2010

8-2-10

Maxine Waters and Charles Rangel are both facing ethics violations. Pundits are wondering if they will play the race card. I think they are better off playing the get out of jail card.

Dr. Phil spent $29 million dollars on a Beverly Hills mansion. "Doctor Phil take a seat in this couch. Let's talk about your obsessive need to over compensate. Have you seen a doctor about your problem down there?"

Former Spice Girl singer Geri Halliwell is reportedl buying a $5 million dollar home in Wiltshire, South West England. At that price, she knows what she wants what she really really wants.

Justin Bieber is turning author and releasing a memoir. It can be found in the children's section under "fiction".

According to Lady Gaga, she spractices abstinence to not hinder her creativity. This may explain why Susan Boyle is freaking brilliant.