Thursday, May 13, 2010

The official Funniest True Story EVER!

This is one of those stories that has to be re-told over and over and it never gets old. In fact, I was asked to repeat this story to a small crowd on a recent trip to a wave of laughter. This is how it was told to me. Here we go. There is a middle-aged woman who has a "retarded" kid. (PC people insert the more favorable term here if you like.) The kid is 19 and is over 6 feet and is described as pretty bulky. He has the mind of a child and can function on his own but still needs supervision. One day, the mother is at work and gets a frantic call from her son. "Mom you have to come over, there is a troll in the bathroom!". The mom tries to reassure her son that there is no "troll" and if there is, he will go away. About 10 minutes later, she received a more panicked call. "Mom you have to come over now there is a troll in the bathroom!!!". The mom has to explain to her boss that she has to leave because she has a kid with special needs that is flipping out. The mother leaves work and when she enters the house, she sees her son throwing candies under the bathroom door where the gap is. He keeps throwing candy under the table repeatedly. The mom opens the bathroom door and Holy Shit there is a midget sitting in the bathroom with a cell phone. It turns out the midget/little person was a census worker and when he approached the house, the kid thought he really was a troll and carried him and threw him in the bathroom. He wanted to "keep" the troll and was feeding the troll candy because we all know, trolls like candy. The tiny census worker admits that he wasn't harmed in the ordeal but still needed to fill out a police report to justify why he was late in returning back to work. I just imagine the story he had for co-workers. "Youre not going to believe what happened to me..."

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