jokes 3-15-11

As a result of the Japanese earthquake, the Earth's day lenght was shortened. This wont be the last time the words "Japanese" "Lenght" and "shortened" will be used in a sentence.(so I've heard.)

Aflac has dumped Gilbert Gottfried, the voice of the insurer's quacking duck, after he posted tastless jokes about the Tsunami via twitter. He apologized explaining he wasn't trying to ruffle any feathers.

Fox News has hired former Democratic Senator Evan Bayh as a contributor to the network. Proving Dick Cheney's contention that water boarding is effective.

At the box office "Battle Los Angeles" is kicking ass while "Mars Needs Moms" bombed. Viewers said seeing aliens in Mars was unrealistic while thousands of aliens actually live in Los Angeles.

A Disney worker had died as a result of injuries he sustained while repairing a ride. At this point, the exact details are unknown. What we do know is Goofy is nowhere to be found.

I normally have more but I'm tired as hell. Good night!