Friday, December 3, 2010

Flashback Friday - The night I almost died in Hollywood

Back in the days when I was young and had balls, I went cruising the famous "Sunset Boulevard Strip" in Hollywood. We packed the cars like good Mexicans and parked on the side of the road; people watching on the strip. We were there to pick up on girls.

After 1/2 hour of watching cars roll by this girl caught my attention. She had her head sticking out of the sun roof and she had big breasts. I had two reasons to speak to her.

"Hey, let me jump in the car with you" I had nothing to lose. She waves me in. I look back to my friends feeling victorious. "I'll catch up with you guys later" I yelled to my crew while feeling like a pimp.

There was a female driver, a girl, and me. We were standing next to each other with our upper halves exposed to the open air. We looked around at the crowd like we were in a parade and I was the Grand Marshall.

I was sure to hook up. I look down and notice that "my girl" had a cast on. No big deal. We reached a red light and while we are waiting for the car to go, I noticed a "low rider" next to us (old card used by many gangsters in Los Angeles) filled with gangster, Mexican chicks. They were hard-core. I looked away.

One of the gangster chicks is mad-dogging (staring with provocation) "my girl" and words are exchanged.

"Fuck you bitch" my girl tells one of the gangsters
"What did you call me bitch? the gangster chick responds.

She gets out of the car and takes a swing at my girl. She grazed me in the process. We duck and get inside the car and we were off, burning rubber down Sunset Boulevard with a carload of gangster chicks chasing us. We lose them and we turn on a side street and park.

"I should have brought my gat"(gun) says the driver.
"What do you normally carry? I ask; You know the usual small talk.
"A 25"

Here is the strange part. Both of the girls had on nice dresses and were well groomed. They didn't look hard core at all. WTF!

My girl opens the trunk and gets a metal pipe and places it next to her leg just in case we run into those girls again. What are the odds?

My thoughts shifted from picking up to surviving the night.

"Can you take me back to my friends?" I ask the driver.

We return to Sunset Boulevard driving slow in the bumper to bumper traffic. There are brights lights and loud rap music everywhere. Around us,cops are pulling over drivers left and right.

We pull in to a Mc Donald's parking lot. I'm getting ready to get dropped off.
"Oh shit I think they are behind us" says the driver.
"Just drop me off. Security is here! I yell.
"Oh shit they saw me!" she continues.

She pushed down on the gas and we were in a high speed chase. She merged onto the 101South freeway and the gangsters were right behind us. We slowed down momentarily as we merged onto the freeway.

"West Side Wilmas! The gangster chicks kept yelling
"West Side Wilmas!"
They were throwing gang signs with their hands.
I sat in the car praying that bullets would not fly and hit me. I kept imagining the back window shattering but like a violent storm, they went away.

They ended up taking me home and it was long ride for them. I was thankful to be alive and I marvelled at the hoops that guys go through for a piece of ass.

(** West Side Wilmas is gang named after the city of Willmington in L.A For a lovely video about them check this out:

Addendum: Shady, the cast was on her arm. I wasn't very clear in the post above.


  1. This post is AWESOME! Those girls were straight up gangsta.

    And you really should have got a lil something for putting your life at risk!

  2. Congrats, Israel. You've just written the screenplay for The Hangover: Part 3.

  3. Yeah shady nailed it. Church going Gangstas and Isreal – can't miss movie!!!!

  4. Whoa, awesome story! I'm going to L.A. next February. I guess I won't get into any cars with strange women, no matter how well-groomed they appear to be. ;)

  5. Hint: never date a woman with a prosthetic leg that doubles as a machine gun!

  6. Great story. My life has been pretty boring. I should have hung out with you when I was younger.

  7. OK my life is officially TEDIOUS now, thanks a lot, Iz! :)

  8. That is scary! I haven't seen anything like that happen around her but I'm glad I haven't.

  9. Israel went gangsta! lol Were their eyebrows shaved and penciled in with black liner and arched? ;)

  10. And here I thought my past experiences were exciting...aren't no high speed chases in my past...

  11. Glad you made it home Israel.

  12. OMG! Glad you made it home safely! I have never experienced or seen anything like it.

  13. I had a similar experience once with some friends when I got in their car not knowing that they were cruising around looking for trouble. Your version is much scarier since you have more potential for real danger in L.A. This post made me laugh.

  14. Good Lord! And in these parts I'M considered pretty tough! I'd be positively victorian over there!

  15. Wow hardcore gangster girls, I'm impressed! More at you though, Israel, than them. What an amazing story of human courage and survival :P