Jokes 8-25-11

A 4.9 earthquake has hit the east coast. In California, we call that an appetizer.

A new game is sweeping Libya: Where's Gaddafi.

A Kentucky jury has ruled for a doctor in a penis amputation suit. They said that the evidence did not stand up in court and the lawyers did not rise to the occasion.

2 birds have tested positive for the West Nile Virus in Wisconsin. Now you know the origin of Angry Birds.

The Oxygen Chanel plans to cancel "The World According to Paris". I'm not holding my breath.

Sean Loftis, a Florida substitute teacher , was fired after the school discovered he did gay porn. That's messed up. I'm not sure who is more anal.

A woman in Alaska has been found guilty of "hot saucing" her son. The judge was enraged that the mom did not use "mild".

The Washington monument top was cracked by the recent earthquake. The last time any crack plagued Washington, Marion Barry was mayor.

A woman sued Match.com after she was was sexually assaulted by a man she met on the dating site. Match.com will not release the perpetrator's real identity, only his screen name: Nomeansyesman2000.

Nancy Reagan fell at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in California only to be caught by Marco Rubio. She said she was grateful for the swift and decisive action of that waiter.