Thursday, August 11, 2011

Jokes 8-11-11



Charla Nash, the lady that got her face mauled by a chimp released pictures of her new face transplant. This is exciting news to the chimp who has been waiting for dessert.

At the Aspen Institute, Al Gore cursed and delivered an angry rant against critics of global warming.He was so angry that even Biden said, "this fucker's good."

Facebook has been linked to poor mental health in teens. Teens refuse to acknowledge this by putting up walls.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average gained over 400 points today. It is rebounding faster than Jennifer Lopez.

In order for America to get it's AAA rating back, it needs to create jobs, cut spending, or hire a stutterer at Standard and Poor's.

Things have gone from bad to worse for Tiger Woods. First he fires his caddie,then Swiss Watchmaker Tag Heuer drops him as a sponsor and replaces him with Flavor Flav.

Sesame Street released an official statement saying that Bert and Ernie are not gay. Big Bird on the other hand...

TBS has decided to cancel Lopez Tonight. He should feel accomplished. After all he's bean there done that.

Kanye West fell down during a performance in Norway fueling my belief in God.

The first vampire bite death in the U.S was reported. The victim tried hard to avoid it but it was all in vein.

8 comments:

  1. Dude! Where ya been??? I've been needing my Israel fix! :) The FB joke rocked!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I've always had the feeling that Big Bird is... you know..?

    ReplyDelete
  3. bahahaha! nah, not big bird. but FOR SURE mr. snufulufugus!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I agree the FB joke was hilarious...and so was the vampire. :D

    ReplyDelete
  5. Flavor Flav!!!!!!! Hahahaha!!!!!!!! Loved that one. Okay, that picture is of her pre-chimp mauling, right? There is no way that can be her face transplant. And that dessert joke? You wrongfodat!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I laughed at this, then felt bad. Now laughing again.

    ReplyDelete