Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Death is it really the end?

Don't worry. This post won't be a metaphysical inquiry into the afterlife. Rather it's a tale that illustrates that even when I try to remain incognito with strangers,they seem to find me.

Today I went to Starbucks to get my liquid crack. I parked behind their parking lot along an alley because there is never any parking at Starbucks.

As I'm approaching my car, I see a middle-aged chubby guy standing outside of his SUV and he is staring at me. I thought he was lost and needed directions.

"How's it going", he tells me with a giant smile.
"How are you?", I replied.
"Mind if I give you some reading material that you can read later?"

He gave me a brochure that Jehova Witnesses use to convert people. it was entitled: Death is it really the end?. Then he got into his automobile and left abruptly.It was as if I was on today's agenda. "Today I shall amuse this Cynical Mexican with religious literature."

Ironically, the name of the brochure is called "Awake" and I received it at Starbucks. Get it?

As I got in my car and drove to work, I began to ask a profound questions. What if God was trying to communicate with me using this jolly man?

I would hate to go to the pearly gates and be confronted by God:

"Why did you ignore my invitation?"
"How was I suppose to know that was you? I heard you work in mysterious ways but come one, give me a pass. And besides, how efficient can one guy be passing out flyers? Haven't you heard of the internet?

"Make room for one more smart ass below"


  1. BEST.POST.EVER!!! You have me rolling over here! That in and of itself is hilarious. But I digress. I'm sure God likes coffee, you should have offered him a latte.

  2. I agree. He should have created a Facebook event instead and invited people. :p

  3. I'm just glad he didn't roll up next to you at a stop light and yell "Hey, have you read it yet?" and when you answered "yes" he would pull out his Glock and blast you.

    Okay, I watch too much TV.

    - Jay

  4. Pushing Awakes at a Starbucks. Hmmm, that makes sense. JW's are marketing geniuses! How come there are never any hot women passing out Playboys or something? It's always something that's supposed to be "good for you" that people give away for free.

  5. Haha! "Make room for one more smart ass below." That had me cracking-up laughing.

  6. You know, as non-religious as I am (even though raised catholic), the last time I was approached by a jehovah's witness & handed a brochure, I questioned if it was a message from a higher power. Immediately, everything I flipped to in the book seemed to eerily pertain to the struggles going on in my life. What are they, god little elf's now?