In China, a girl was born with two heads. She was named Sum Tin Wong.
Dominique Strauss Kahn, the head of International Monetary Fund has been jailed on allegations that he tried to rape a hotel maid. Speaking of rape, did I mention that he is jail?
The pope has issued new guidelines to bishops all over the world on how it will handle suspected cases of sex abuse. He also distributed condoms and candy.
Inspired by Facebook, An Israeli couple has named their baby “Like” The Dad should also change his name to “What’s on your Mind?”
After 45 years of being the host of the MDA telethon, Jerry Lewis is walking away. Why rub it in?
On Monday, the U.S hit the debt ceiling at $14.3 trillion. On Tuesday, The U.S stopped answering calls from China that began, “this is an attempt to collect a debt…”
Being Mexican, I am acutely aware of the negative stereotypes about my peeps. So it doesn't help when I see shit that makes me scratch my head and say, no wonder they think we're ghetto. In this sense, we are similar to blacks and my man Q will back me up on this. Quincy from Thank Q For Common Sense had a recent article where the theme and conclusion was that there is nothing fabulous about being "ghetto fabulous." I have to agree. " Exhibit #1:
BABY T-SHIRTS AT THE MONTEBELLO TOWN CENTER
I went to the mall and had to take a picture of the baby shirts that proud Mexican parents can buy their children:
"Daddy's Lil Homie" - I just love the indoctrination that this shirt will produce. For those who grew up in the burbs and don't know what a "homie" is, it's like a good friend except that the term homie comes from "homeboy" which is a term used synonymous with gang member. Good job Daddy. Maybe you can offer tips on doing drive by shootings.
"Half Beaner" - I have to admit this is kinda funny but can I can't imagine other races doing similar things. Imagine Jews having shirts that read: Half Kike or Arab babies wearing 1/2 camel jockey tees. You get the point.
"I love Boobies" - Who is the soccer mom that will buy Jr the shirt that virtually guarantees that he will grow up to be a pervert lurking behind every dark corner with a trench coat and vaseline.
"My Mom is hot" - Are some women so insecure that they have to have their kids be walking billboards? The kid wearing this shirt should really be wearing a shirt that reads, "Mommy doesn't really like condoms and she makes poor choices. I'm proof."
As seen on Greenleaf Boulevard -Uptown Whittier, CA
Today is Cinco De Mayo, a time when Mexican Americans ask, Why Should the Irish be the only ones with a day to get drunk.
Henry Cavil, who plays "Superman" is engaged to his kleptomaniac girlfriend, Ellen Whitaker. Afterall, he is the man of steal. (yes, it will get worse)
In Japan they have created a machine that simulates "French Kissing". It will soon be available in stores everywhere right next to World of Warcraft.
The price of oil tumbled 7% as demand for it sunk. In fact, it sunk so low that it is now dating Snooki.
A study out of the Netherlands has concluded that sex and coffee may trigger a stroke. Except in my case. I drink coffee before I stroke my trigger. (sometimes the best part of waking up is just waking up)
Octomom's fertility doctor might lose his license. If he does, he will be octo gone (told you it would get worse)
The Syrian army has started to pull out of Daraa. I don't know Daraa but she better carry condoms.
At the time of his death, it appears that Osama Bin Laden had an escape plan since he had money stitched to his clothes. Either that or he was recently married and was doing his first dance.
It was the elite Seal Team Six that was responsible for killing Bin Laden. They have a new slogan: Bin There. Done that.
A top U.S official has confirmed that Bin Laden attempted to use one of his wives as a shield when U.S Forces began shooting him. Unfortunately, she was wearing her Target shirt.
Now that Bin Laden has been captured one lucky Pakistani is left wondering: How many camels will $25 million get me?
Is "Pakistan" the name of a country or a statement about a guy named Pak that likes the sun?
Bin Laden was given a religious funeral prior to being buried at sea. His supporters are outraged. He can't swim!
Many republicans are using the news of Obama's killing to advocate the policy of torture, Or as it is commonly known as: Watching Fox News.
After more than 10 years and countless deaths, America's public enemy #1 (Bin Laden) was killed. To say that this even is huge in an understatement, we are witnessing history unfold. Years from now, you will be able to answer the question, "Where were you when Osama Bin Laden was killed?"
While this event will send shockwaves to the world, and bring some solace to those affected by 911, I can't help but anticipate that there will be alot of haters that will minimize the accomplishments of Obama. I recall Rush Limbaugh publicly stating that he wishes Obama to fail! Obama took care of business quietly. He did not put on army gear and fly on a fighter jet. He did not publicly state "Mission Accomplished". He told us that this country is facing an enemy and challenges that will force him to make difficulty decisions. Yet, he did what two presidents were unable to do: he captured Bin Laden. To quote rap great KRS ONE, "Real bad boys move in silence.
Just last week, Obama had to release his birth certificate to prove he is an American. Imagine that. Clowns like Trump and birthers have been made to eat crow and I can just imagine what the other side is going to do to downplay this great accomplishment.
Sadly, as much as I want to believe that the attacks against Obama are not motivated by race, there are too many instances where racism has been made apparent albeit in subtle ways.
In the beginning, Obama's faith was questioned. Was he a Christian or a Muslim? Then, his place of birth was questioned. Next, came the ridiculous portrayal of Obama as Hitler. To make matters worse, the Tea Baggers presented racist imagery of Obama as a witch doctor, monkey , or using slang. (The implication being that Obama, because he is black is uneducated and "ghetto") I predict that credit will be given to the "great strides that were made during the Bush administration." I also predict that his accomplishment will be questioned.
I can't wait to listen to talk radio and listen to the right wing psychos hate on Obama. But tonight love him or hate him, he took care of business and history will remember that.
